the dress

Tonight I had a wonderful dinner and shopping with my Aunt and cousin! We try to do that twice a year, and now that me and my cousin Ali are both in college it gets tough.  But we shopped till we dropped! While rummaging through the sale rack I came across a hot little black dress that just screamed my name and practically pulled me into the rack! It was marked down to 20 bucks. A steal right? YES.  So i tried it on and of course visioned myself in black heels and lookin super pretty and I could not say no.  I know my birthday is not for another 2 months but it never hurts to start looking early! Oh and did I mention it will be my 21st.  That most defiantly calls for a special dress.  Getting home tonight my Dad and brother also approve. Thank goodness, because they have not been a fan of some things in the past HAHA  I wont post it now but when I'm in it look out for pictures galore! 

random thoughts

Too often lately I would love to just pack a small bag and go somewhere like this, how awesome. It would be so relaxing and peaceful.  It would be nice to go with a love, but I don't have one.  So, I would take a girlfriend or my mom for a weekend get away.  Visioning now drinking coffee on that deck. Speechless.

I love flowers, I am sometimes by them for myself, not kidding either.  I want gardens some day, and lots of them.  I want a guy to bring me flowers just because, they could be from the side of the road and I would not care.  I also love photograpghy. I am good at taking pictures and would love more practice and take it up as a side job.  I love capurting candid moments of family and friends, and would love to also capture some of natures beauty.

This verse I replay over in my head almost every day and a lot in the past year.  Its one of my favorites because it is true.  In my darkess days this past year I say it to myself and I know things are going to be OK. When people come in and out of my life, its for a reason.  And only God knows.. and each one teaches me a lesson that God wanted me to know and that is his way of teaching me. I dont always like it, but I learn and grow.  I cant fret about the future like usually do because it ruins mty present time.  Its in God's hand and he has a much better plan for me than I have for myself.  My road has been very rough, but its slowly getting better.  I have grown so much in my faith and myself.  I am so thankful for that.

Currently obsessed with this song at the moment. Love it.

good mornings

For some reasons mornings are my favorite. I just plain old love them.  Maybe, its because they mean the start of a new day, or you can drink coffee in the quiet, or maybe its the rise of the sun that wakes my soul up for all the days possibilities.  I just love mornings.

This year, I'm looking forward to waking up in my house and sipping on coffee before class, checking my blogs while the sun peers through my windows, and sitting in my pajamas.  One of the great things also, it the texts you sometimes wake up to. Those are simply the best.  Last year a dear friend of mine would text me in the morning twice a week when we had class together and I LOVED it.  No, it wasn't from a guy, but a girlfriend and it was still sweet to wake up to.  The next relationship I am in, I want those cute text.  It takes like less then a second to text someone something cute in the morning.  But they have to want to, it will be important to me so I hope it will be important to them.  Getting a text is a great way to start off the day, and puts a smile on your face before you even get out of bed!

I absolutely love this, one day :)

I also can sport this well.

Cheers to mornings!

lets catch up on this crazy thing call life

Its been awhile but sometimes life just gets in the way and you wanna go crazy and just scream.  Too often that happened to me this summer, but I made it through.  I have about two weeks left before I head back to school and am looking forward to this year and what it all has to offer for me.  Ill be living in a house with three other amazing girlfriends and also be turning 21 during my junior year.  A few years ago I thought that this time would never come, being half way done with college. It has been a wonderful experience and I have met some amazing people that make me think where have you been my whole life.  So, cheers to a new year and a new beginning.

Now, for some catching up on this twenty girls crazy summer...

My dad is now healing in the smallest way with the divorce and is no longer angry.  It breaks my heart when I see him sad or see him cry and try my toughest to lift him up with positive thoughts.  Its been about 7 months since this horrible thing has happened but sure has made me look at life differently and how you treat people that you love.  And also my vision of love too.  Its not easy, and I think when you I do fall in love it will be hard to me to open up and let people in.  I'm still working on that with all the past failed relationships.  Like they say you must be with all the wrong ones before you find the right one.

My mom has started to date, and has a "boyfriend" but when I talk about him I just refer to him as her friend. He is a very nice guy and makes her happy.. but I still think it was too fast.  For some reason it doesnt bother me as much as I thought it would... but my brother on the other hand has had a tough time with it.  If it makes her happy she should be with him since she has not felt that way in a long time.  Just like me she will date guys some longer than the other, it is still weird to think about.  I pray that my dad can find happiness again, and love.  It will take him longer but I believe he will be ok, and he will find someone to share some happines with.

Last summer I had absolutely no romance, and now this summer more than one romance has occurred.  in previous post about the guy that didn't kiss me... well he turned out also to stop talking to me also, to talking to me again, to stop talking to me.  What a winner right? I was so upset the first time because there was no reason just plain old stopped.  That all was cleared up about three weeks later, but I had moved on from being bitter from it because I was not about to waste my feelings on him.  I know we are still OK and I could call him for a favor and he would come to my rescue... I guess its a perfect example of something that is not meant to be.

Now, for the next boy this summer.  So far he has topped them all.  He works for my moms "friend"

and has been wanting to meet me pretty much the whole summer.  I was always hesitate because my mother and I don't always have the same taste in looks HAHA and I was still hung up on the jerk from school.  But I ended up meeting him at a fish weigh in and I thought he was pretty awesome for the 20 minutes that we spoke.  He finally got my number and we went out on a date.  Fishing and dairy queen.  It was wonderful and he did kiss me once the night ended!  And the nights after that also when ever I saw him.  Last week we spent a lot of time together and I grew to like him more and more.  I know I know he likes me though we have never told one another.  Now he is back at school, with less free time to talk I feel like its already drifting... I dont know much about him and the way he works but I need to slow my thinking down or I am just going end up disappointing myself again. NO GOOD.  For now, I have to look at it as something new, and accept the fact his life has a change it because he now has school and see how much effort he makes into talking to me.  My brother has told me more than once I hold onto guys longer than I should, and I do.  I cant    keep doing that.  He is pretty awesome and I am willing to work at it if he does, and if he gives up (like every other guy I have known) that just means there is better out there.

Whew, enough of venting! Mi goodness.  With all the craziness this summer I am so thankful for the love and support from my girlfriends and family.  Never new the beginning of my twenties would be so emotional but it has just made me a stronger person and I found out how tough I really am.

No one promised life would be easy, but they promised it would be worth it.